Tenant cohabitation? It can be a beautiful experience or really difficult-it all depends on the ability to find the right traveling companion. Sharing one’s living space with other people, in fact, can lead to many problems when one cannot find a person whose lifestyle is compatible with one’s own. Incomprehensible habits, incompatible characters, different needs-every aspect can contribute to turning cohabitation into a little domestic hell. To avoid finding yourself fighting a small war within the walls of your home, therefore, it is best to plan a careful selection of your tenant. It is important to respect common areas (see our guide on shared appliances ) and private areas, so here are five questions you need to ask when you are looking for a roommate.
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1) Is this your first cohabitation? Are you a freshman?
Like any life experience, living together requires special skills that can be honed with experience. Disposition to dialogue, discretion, gifts of understanding: sometimes, managing a peaceful relationship with one’s roommates is tantamount to bringing all one’s diplomatic qualities to bear. If this is your first experience of living with a stranger, therefore, assume that you too will have to modify your habits to some extent to make them compatible with those of a new person, who will have the same rights and duties as you within the common spaces. The secret? Being able to distinguish the unavoidable needs from the aspects you could file down in the name of a more serene and rewarding experience for all. The watchword is ‘transparency’: make it clear from the first interview with your would-be roommate what is important to you and what, on the other hand, you might turn a blind eye to. Exercising your flexibility will also surely make the search for the perfect tenant much easier.
2) What do you study and what are your interests?
The choice of a tenant must also be guided by some basic cautions that cannot be overlooked. Think about it: it involves sharing your most intimate dimension-that is, your home dimension-for a long time with a person you do not know and who does not know you. Adjusting to each other’s habits will be much easier, in fact, if living together starts with some important aspect capable of bringing your lives together. First ask yourself a few questions about the most important aspects of your personality. Are you a musician and need to practice for a long time? Perhaps sharing a home with a student who is used to seeking silence to study is not the right choice; a worker who spends the crucial hours of his day in the office would be better. Similar life needs and compatible interests will be the right cards to make this new experience work better. Outline your sketch and always keep it in mind before you choose, using it as a guide when you are on the verge of looking for whom to live with.
3) Smoker or non-smoker?
One aspect not to be underestimated in the search for a roommate is that of the difficult coexistence between smokers and nonsmokers. Indeed, those who smoke (and have no intention of quitting) will be perpetually looking for a way to do so quietly inside the home, perhaps after meals or at the most unlikely times. Non-smokers, conversely, will never resign themselves to the perennial smell of nicotine that hovers in a smoker’s home. Coexistence between smokers and nonsmokers will always be very difficult to make work: whether you belong to one or the other category, therefore, always remember to investigate this before deciding with whom to share your living space: you may not realize the difficulties until later, after you have started living together.
4) What do you like to do in your spare time?
Who said a tenant should just be a stranger with whom you share bills? If the choice falls on the right person and your lifestyles are really compatible, a beautiful friendship might even be born. The best way to make it happen is undoubtedly to share a few evenings of fun, perhaps by taking him to a pleasant musical evening at that little club you like so much. Obviously, however, you will have to make sure that your tastes in leisure are similar and compatible. Again, therefore, playing it safe and informing yourself well about your would-be roommate’s hobbies and interests could prevent the emergence of many misunderstandings and misconceptions. Always try, politely and respectfully, to delve into aspects of his hobbies and dating habits first. You could both expand your circle of friends and meet some new clubs to hang out together.
5) Single or engaged? Brothers and sisters in the city?
Every person has a universe of important relationships around them that they carry with them wherever they go. Friends, girlfriends, relatives, but above all, partners and emotional relationships: before sharing spaces with someone, point out and try to understand in turn what their respective romantic situations are. If you are engaged or your prospective tenant is, in fact, you should keep in mind that you will often be forced to share spaces with each other’s partners. The issue could exert consequences on your lifestyles, especially if it involves relationships with people who do not live in the city and may need overnight hospitality during visits. Again, the situation can only be handled optimally by approaching the issue with transparency and clarity: bathroom use times, division of expenses, and attendance at common spaces are just some of the aspects to consider before reaching an agreement.
The search for a tenant, therefore, may prove more difficult than choosing the house itself. Precautions and cautions can never be too many, but it will be useful to keep one piece of advice in mind above all: before expecting from your neighbor all the qualities of a perfect tenant, always try to offer as much respect, flexibility and understanding.
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